~ i want to be able to make an appointment without getting attitude from your office staff. without having to explain in detail why i need an appointment. without having to prove or persuade your office staff i need an appointment, and without having to give them my social security number.
~i don’t want to have to wait an hour to see a nurse or p.a. when i arrive for my appointment.
~i want the nurse i see to not announce my weight to everyone within earshot and i want an accurate blood pressure. tip: use a machine to do the blood pressure because if not your results will always be called into question as to their accuracy.
~i don’t want to have to fill out a questionaire that isn’t relevant to my doctor’s appointment. my family history isn’t something that i want everyone to know, especially if it has no bearing on my being treated.
~i want to talk to you, not the nurse, p.a. and office staff about my symptoms. i shouldn’t have to repeat the same information over and over. on some visits, by the time i get to see you or the physician’s assistant, i have repeated myself 3-4 times.
~if your nurse does a history on me, actually read what he or she wrote before you ask me the same exact questions they asked me.
~i’d like to actually see you-eventually. i know physician’s assistants have their benefits, but they do not have the same skills as you.
~i would like to not have to wait so long to get an appointment to see a you. you can try to make this look like you are so busy, but we all know that’s not the case.
~i’d like you to know my name before you walk into the room to see me.
~i’d like to NOT have to shake your hand. i don’t know where its been. you are a doctor and you see sick people all day. why would i want to expose myself to that?
~i’d like you to listen to me and ask questions relevant to you being able to treat what is wrong with me.
~i’d like you to actually read my chart before you see me so you know WHY you are seeing me. the same goes for performing procedures. i’d like you to review my chart beforehand so when it is time for the procedure you know why you are doing it.
~if i ask you a question i want you to answer me. i ask because i want to know, to understand-not because i am stupid. if you don’t know say so and send me to someone who does know, could know, or would know. don’t feed me a line of bs. i’m not a doctor but i do know enough to know when you are full of it. don’t waste my time and money. i don’t go to the doctor for fun. i go to get treated. so you calling me a hypochondriac because you lack the skills or work ethic to treat me isn’t doing anything to help your reputation.
~i want you to treat me like a person. i’m not your subject to be treated the way you want to treat me. i am your patient and your job is to provide a service to me. your job is dependent on patients using your services. i shouldn’t have to be grateful that you actually treated me like a person and was kind enough to actually want to fix whatever illness i had.
~wait until i see you to diagnose me. i want to be treated for what is wrong with me, not what other people think might be wrong with me, what you assume i have wrong with me, or what you have decided you are going to say i have wrong with me. to do this you have to do something that every doctor should know how to do–listen.
~i want you to treat me. not other people. i am not a fake patient, part of role play, a game, or part of a reinactment. i am an actual patient who works for a living. i am not independently wealthy. so, your attempts to milk me for more money than what i have might be the reason why i don’t like to pay your bills.
~how about not charging an arm and a leg for less than 5 minutes of your time. i am not rich. i have a problem having sympathy for you and your finances when i have to spend my money and time to see you for such a brief period of time. i spent part of my day to see you when i could have been doing other things. i may/may not have been given an adequate diagnosis, treatment, or time to explain my medical problems and you want me to pay you a high fee for it?
~i want a doctor’s appointment that isn’t a gamble. are you a good person to see? are you going to be an asshole? are you going to treat me for what is actually wrong with me? are you going to charge me an outrageous bill? are you going to be someone i see again, or am i going to have to spend more money trying to get treated by someone else?
~i want to know what the charges are. you don’t know? why not? and your office staff doesn’t know either? that’s something you should know the answer to.
~if you are a woman, how about not being a total bitch. maybe i came to see you because i preferred being seen by a woman. i know medical school can be tough, but really? you have to take it out on me?
~i don’t want to question whether or not my exam, procedure, or visit was legit. how about you do things the way they are supposed to be done. i am not made of money and do not have the time or finances to be seen by multiple people to find the right person to treat me. be the right one the first time.
~HIPPA do you know what that is? then why aren’t you and your office staff adhering to it?
~billing-does your office staff know what to do? if not, why are they still employed? they are a part of your office along with your front office staff. they represent you. i don’t want to be charged for stuff you didn’t do. i don’t want outrageous bills for things i could have had done elsewhere without insurance for less money. if you were involved just a smidge with your office’s day to day operations, you would know things that could enhance your practice.
~treat me as a person. i know you might be seeing me for one body part, but some other part of my body might be causing my problem. this should be common sense.
~don’t joke, make fun of me, or talk about me where i can hear it. don’t talk about me or make fun of me to your office staff, friends, or colleagues. my office visit and medical records are private and should remain that way. your office staff needs to learn this too. professionalism is something you should have mastered before you graduated from medical school.
~explain to me what’s going to happen, what can happen, or what i have. i shouldn’t have to ask everything. part of your job is to communicate to your patients.
~take a cue from the doctors people like. study them. try to be like them. because they are going to take all of your patients if you don’t learn from them.